Saturday, May 8, 2010

Alphonse Dacey (my uncle)

Beads of Joy 05-08-10

Dedication Days - Alfonse Dacey (my uncle)
©2010 James Dacey, Jr. SFO

Dedication Days
Hello Everyone,

There are so many people I want to dedicate my love, allegiance and respect to. Some of these people are in my life now, and throughout the past 45 years who have helped shaped me to the person I am today. Soon after a couple more friends and extended family members are shared and dedicated, I will be focusing on my immediate family. Today I bow my head and say a prayer for an uncle who became my pal, my buddy, and a real close friend, and whom I miss dearly. Let me introduce my Uncle Alphonse Dacey, he is my dad's older brother. As an uncle he was more like a "cousin", we had so much in common, and it was from that common ground that we bonded. It literally all stemmed from "my story". If you read my story when I began my life in Jesus, you'll see how my family history and my family became so important to me, and I learned to find out my Uncle Al had the same love for our family. And from all that I learned that my Uncle Al was the Dacey Family Historian.

What a passion he had for our family, and all of it's history. He and I use to talk for hours every time we got together, we were like buddies. At the time he told me about all the information and details he had collected over the years about our families heritage. See we originally came from Salerno, Italy in 1875, he had so many details of conversations, decisions made, his parents (my grandparents) story about how there marriage was pre-planned by two close buddies back in Italy. It's a really exciting story. In fact my uncle wrote a book that he made enough copies for all his siblings, I got one to. LOL. He wowed me with so much information, it was incredible all of what he had learned. But you know what was really cool, was when I started getting into it; and I got copies of their legal immigration papers, copies of the tickets when my family took the "America" the ship to come to America, wedding certificates. Now I got to wow him, he was shocked how after all the years he did family history and got so much; here I came along and found even more. I even found an additional uncle of his, he never knew, no one ever told him, and there was no family records. Well I found death records of a two year old, who was his dad's (my grandpa's) brother. It was a pretty amazing find indeed.

Then the time came where my uncle knew how much work we'd put into the research we did together and he told me he wanted to pass the torch to me. I was like "WOW !!!". He said my excitement and obvious ability to attain information made it obvious that I had a passion for our family. So thank God, he was alive to tell me that and he really made me feel incredible that he entrusted such an honorable fun job to me. I really miss working elbow to elbow with him, we use to share our finds and swap information. And then there were times we use to have a poster board on the table with charts, and we'd make notes. I'd share my finds, he'd fill in the gapes with stuff I just didn't know. I got to tell you we had an incredible bond. It was always fun. My uncle Al was always a good man, a respectful devout family man; even his ex-wife (my Aunt Kitty) loved and adored him even though they both went their own separate ways. She told me that she still loves him. I shall always have a special love for him in my heart. His spiritual life was a very private one. He reminds me of His mom, my grandma. She told me, she had a devotion to our Blessed Mother, a very private one, she was old school Italy in her ways. She spoke broken english and couldn't write any english.

As the end drew near, he came down to the shop (me and my dads collision repair shop) and said to us; that in a few days he'd be going back for his second triple bi-pass surgery. At that time it been ten years since he had his first and and he was told that they usually only last about that long; and that was a little more than twenty years ago. We talked and laughed and at the time I remember telling him, "You'll be fine, I'll be praying for you. Once you are up to it, we'll get back together to further our family studies." Well I guess at this point of the dedication, you already know he don't come home, he never actually made it through the surgery. I will never forget the day we got the call. I was in my garage at home, and I had the cordless. Chrissy was in the house with some friends of hers who were visiting, and the kids were all playing. If I remember correctly, it was my dad who called me. I need not tell you how the news overwhelmed and crushed me. After our very short chat and crying voices, I needed to take a walk. At the time we were living the home we owned in Milford,PA in Country Club Woods, so we had some property. Well I went in our back woods and I collapsed next a tree and cried and cried and cried, I have no idea how long I was out there. But when I came back Chrissy said, "Where have you been, we've been looking for you for a while." I told her what happened and that I needed to be a lone for a while, she understood. Every single time someone dear to me leaves me I am crushed and honestly I am brought to uncontrollable tears. Yes I believe and I know where we are all going. It's rather selfish of me I know, but I can't help it.

Today I salute you: Uncle Al
I miss you so much, wish we got to spend more time.
You are always in my heart and always in my prayers.

Your brother in Christ Jesus & His Most Blessed Mother,
Jim (The Rosary Man) Dacey Jr SFO